Strategic Networking | Stories With Traction Podcast

EPISODES MENTIONED IN INTRO:

Stories of Leadership
How to Get Involved in Politics
How to Build a Legacy
How Hobbies Make You More Creative

SHOW NOTES:

SUMMARY: In this episode, Terence Farrell and Matt Zaun discuss how to have intentionality and strategy behind networking.

TERENCE FARRELL BIO: Terence served as a Chester County Commissioner for 12 years, and before that, he was the Recorder of Deeds for 8 years.  Today, he is the President of For Real Solutions, a consulting firm that brings value to its clients through leveraging Terence’s knowledge, experience, network, and creativity. Two of the major focuses for his business are on reducing healthcare costs for various organizations and mitigating loss in pension funds that occur because of fraud or other illegal activities.

For more info, check out Terence HERE.


MATT ZAUN BIO: Matt is an award-winning speaker and storyteller who empowers organizations to attract more clients through the art of strategic storytelling. Matt’s past engagements have catalyzed radical sales increases for over 300 organizations that range from financial institutions to the health and wellness industry.

Matt shares his expertise in persuasion with executives, sales professionals, and entrepreneurs, who he coaches on the art of influence and how to leverage this for profits and impact.

For more info, check out Matt Zaun HERE. 

 

*Below is an AI-generated transcript, which may contain errors.

 

 

Matt Zaun 

Terence, welcome back.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Thank you, Matt. Thanks again for having me.

 

Matt Zaun 

I really appreciate your time and I learned a lot from our conversations and I want to dive into another topic today that we haven't really gone through on networking.

And I want to talk about the strategy of networking, how you leverage networking to get to where you are.

And this is going to be an extension of other episodes that we had done before. We did stories of leadership, where really kind of went through different elements of your life, and then how to get involved in politics and how to change your community.

And a lot of that ties back into what you've done networking-wise. So where I want to start this conversation is there's been a major shift culturally to social media.

And for anyone that has watching! As listening to this podcast, I've done numerous episodes on how people can intentionally and strategically utilize social media.

So I'm not knocking social media. My business has very much positively benefited from utilizing social media, and I know that a lot more people can take a hold of social media and get it to work for them.

But I feel like there's been a disconnect when it comes to likes on a screen, first actually networking with human beings, shaking hands, building the connection.

And I feel like it's being lost. I don't know if it's a generational thing or what we've done culturally speaking in society to kind of have that fray.

But I want to gear a conversation in that way that a lot of people are missing the importance of networking because of what social media has done.

And again, there's a big difference between getting a bunch of likes, first actually shaking a bunch of hands and having conversations.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

when I say network, What is the first thing that comes to your mind, Terence? Let's paint the scene for people.

When I say networking, where does your mind go to? Well, first of all, I appreciate that perspective about social media.

There may be a disconnect between people liking and in-person meetings and in-person networking, but properly utilize social media. There's a ton of platforms.

You have to pick your own favorite, but social media can be a form of networking. use it beneficially as a form going beyond just the lights.

It can also be used to reinforce in-person meetings. I use it in that capacity. But traditionally, what networking, at least for me as a recovering politician, has meant is that it was a series of going to events, whether they were

A government-based or non-profit-based or politically-based or for whatever reason, maybe they're just going over to a friend's house for a barbecue and meeting people in person, having a conversation with them, being able to discern pretty quickly where some synergies might be, how I might be able to help that person or handle how that person helped me.

Part of the whole strategy of networking, of course, is to be able to follow up with somebody. you know, when I think of networking, there's a whole process from meeting a person, having a conversation that is at least somewhat meaningful to that person so they do recall me, finding out how I can follow up with them.

You know, it was getting a business card or finding a phone number, but nowadays I can just ask. For example, are you on LinkedIn?

That's sufficient for me to be able to follow up and to get all the other information I need. So, networking to answer your questions specifically, at least traditionally has met meeting people in person, connecting, sharing information about how to follow up, and then following up.

 

Matt Zaun 

I like how your mind went right to the process of networking. mentioned not only the meeting but the follow-up.

So, obviously, there's an intentionality behind that networking. Now, does this go through your mind before you enter a room?

If we're going to talk about in-person networking. So, I want you to imagine you're at the door walking into whether it's a conference or walking into a ballroom.

You're about ready to shake hands with people. Is there an idea of this is what I want to accomplish when the night is over?

Like, is that in your mind? Or have you built that such a systematic approach that's almost instinctual at this point?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Well, it's both instinctual and intentional. So I've gone over the process so many times, meeting people, making sure I get the information, making sure perhaps I tell a joke or something that's memorable so that they realize and remember who I am.

But it's also intentional when I'm going to a particular event, I'm going through my mind and, know, particularly when I was in governmental office, I often got a list of who was going to be at an event before the event.

So I could go through it and say, oh, I need to talk to Darius about this, or I need to talk to Sean about this, or Emily about this.

And if I see them, then that will be top of mind. So I prepared, you know, four or five names.

But when I go into a room, sometimes I pause at the beginning of the room, know, somebody would read me, maybe we'll have a brief conversation, and then they'll leave.

And I'll look around the room to see who's there and who I might want to engage in conversation with.

So there's that intentionality, but there's also this intentionality of having the conversation. And sometimes the person is wanting to talk to me for a reason, and that provides a basis for reciprocity, or me being able to do something for that person before I'm asking for them to do something for me.

So engaging and encouraging them and incentivizing them to really follow up with me and to form that bond. So it's both instinctual and intentional in my networking at this point.

 

Matt Zaun 

Let's expand out that research perspective. Are there specific things that you're focused on? Research-wise, is it where they went to school and a little bit about their background, so you can build that rapport or what...

If you were to list off maybe three of the top things you look for in that research, what would they be?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Well, I think the goal, as you mentioned, is to build rapport. And the rapport can be anything that I note in the research.

There's so much available on the internet, in social media, and I usually do a lot of research, particularly if I'm going into a room with some people I don't know, particularly.

If I'm going into a room with an elected official, say, or a group of elected officials, I will have looked at their profiles on their governmental webpage, maybe I looked at what they've done on LinkedIn, maybe I even looked at Facebook.

And really what I'm looking for, Matt, is a connection. It doesn't have to be a specific question or a specific topic, but something that resonates in terms of what I'm doing.

So, I don't look to whether they're playing music, whether they're into sports, whether they've got a particular thing that they mentioned, if they're into holistic health or vegetarianism, something that I can make the comment on.

And I've got enough background and enough different areas that all I really need is one or two topics to engage in conversation with.

And then from that point, things flow naturally.

 

Matt Zaun 

All right. I like what you just said, flow naturally. And I want to speak to that because I got in trouble years ago with the mentality I had regarding networking.

So, I'm a big research guy. I'm into a lot more data points. And last data points, I don't think anyone would probably argue that point, It's good to have a lot more information than last.

But what I did was I built up so much research that when I I went into a meeting. I had an agenda.

And when the agenda didn't go my way, when the conversation didn't go the way that I wanted, I got a little bit flustered.

Maybe not... Maybe the person that I was with didn't see the frustration, but internally, I'm thinking, like, this isn't going the direction I want.

This isn't good, right? Because I did all this research. So it wasn't until I shifted my focus towards curiosity versus having that agenda.

So what do I mean by this? So, you know, I'd be doing research. And I saw that, hey, they went to this school.

They were raised in this area. They followed the sports team. So surely they check these boxes. So when I have a conversation, here's what's gonna come out.

And it wasn't going in with that curiosity. And then I was able to kind of shift and focus on, all right, I know a little bit about this person, but I'm still gonna be curious to kind of see where that conversation flows.

So I like that you said flows naturally. So if a conversation conversation isn't What do you do when you might be a little bit frustrated where an evening of networking is going?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

What interests them? And then responding to that interest. I think I'm a Renaissance man in the fact that I can talk about a lot of different subjects.

But ultimately, there has to be some sort of connection for me to continue talking to somebody, particularly when I'm in a room full of other peoples.

So it might be that conversation is flowing, it's back and forth. I'm seeing where we might be able to work together.

I'm going to get out of this conversation and move on rather than being trapped because, you know, and a networking event at some kind of event, you know, time is limited.

You're only going to have certain amount of time and you want to get to maybe that one person in the room that you need to connect with.

And it's not necessarily numbers. It's really quality of the connection. So I'm not looking to connect with everybody in the room.

And I'm usually going in with a mindset that this will be a successful evening if I connect with that one person who I resonate with and who I can help and who can help me.

 

Matt Zaun 

All right. So let's dive in even further. So everyone listening. just I just want you to recognize the importance.

And here's one of the main reasons why I wanted to have Terence on to talk about this specific topic is over my career, I have worked with and seen hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of politicians in action.

I have yet to find a politician that has been able to work a room like Terence Farrell. And I mean that sincerely, and I mean that in a very positive way, like you really know almost like the rules of engagement when it comes to networking in a big big way regarding that work the room piece.

So I want to talk about the different dynamics. So I want people to view this almost like a sports type game where like let's look at football, right?

You have rules of engagement, you have a certain time, there's different distractions that could be happening during the game.

There's strategy, there's intentionality, there's different plays, all these things. I don't think enough people view networking in this way.

I've never read the business book in my entire life that says networking is not important. Every single business book talks about the sheer importance of networking.

I always want to challenge people, what are you doing with that importance? How are you actually making your networking better?

goes back to people like your self-terence that are masters at networking. You had mentioned what happens when you get stuck in a certain conversation.

Well, clearly there are decision makers in a room that you want to get to. I want people to picture this.

So picture, you're in a room. Let's say there's 200 people in the room and Terence, you've identified three key decision makers in this room that you need to talk to.

There's two hours, like if we're going to look at a sports analogy, there's a certain amount of time. So there's two hours for this networking event.

How Do you make sure that you're having those conversations with those three decision makers in that time? Because there's going to be other people that are going to come up to you and they're going to bombard you and they're going to try to have conversations.

What's going through your head to get to those decision makers?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Well, first of all, one of the things that you need to bring to the room, need to bring to the event, need to bring to the football game.

When you come to the football game is energy. You need to have a high level of energy. You can't be dragging, know, awards.

You're not going to do your best if you are dragging. You're going to want to come, you know, ready to meet people, energize, ready to have conversations at a high energy level.

And that's the first thing. So to be able to work a room, and I have worked a room, you know, going from table table or person to person, you've got to have the energy and people will feel.

If you're going through the motions rather than sincerely asking them about what they want to do. But, as I mentioned, sometimes when I first come into a room, I will scan the room looking for who's there at the registration table if their name badge is out.

And I'm early, which I try to be. I like to see on the name badges, lay down on the table who's there and who I want to be in touch with.

But then as I go into the room, I'll scan the room. Before I engage in a conversation, because there's one way to really turn someone off, and that is if you're talking to them and looking over their shoulder or looking past them for that next most important or more important person to talk to them that people are You see that right away, they feel that, you just might as well turn away and leave right away rather than try and make believe that you're actually interested in talking to that person.

So, you know, if there's three key people, sometimes I'm not able to reach them all. But, you know, if I can reach the one person, and, you know, the networking does not necessarily end when that event ends.

So often, if I want to talk to somebody, it might just be an in-passing kind of conversation where, you know, that person's going toward the food, I'm going toward the beer.

And I just say, hey, John, I'd like to give you a call later on. Are you around later this day or later in the week?

And that person will acknowledge that. So, you know, I don't have to have that conversation there. I can, you know, follow up with a phone call, follow up with an email.

But I try to, you know, try to get to those people I want to talk to there. But once again, decisions really aren't made, you know, in that networking room, you know, particularly if I'm asking you

For a contractor, need to explain something more deeply. I'm looking to set that as a platform or a springboard to either get together with that person later, maybe for lunch, maybe just at the office, maybe doing something else, or have a phone call, a Zoom call, followed by an email.

So it's not necessarily that everything's going to take place there. And usually, if I'm going into the room, I've met most of these people before.

They know me. I know them. There may be some people I want to know and want to know better.

Sometimes that's just happenstance that I have a conversation with someone who's virtually a stranger, and we find out that we have something in common and want to strengthen that by a follow-up.

Follow-up call, conversation, in-person meeting, lunch, dinner, whatever. So I don't necessarily get to all three. I have a list in mind.

 

Matt Zaun

Could we meet for coffee on Thursday, right? It's less weird than emailing someone saying, hey, I thought of you, can we get together?

Right? So there is a little bit of a strategy with that as well. But I did want to touch on the energy piece.

So for people listening, just so you can understand just how draining someone like a Terence's calendar used to be going from event to event to event.

mean, you told me once about it.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

That's a really good question. When I was a county commissioner for Chester County, I did have staff to help me with a lot of the aspects.

I had somebody who would schedule. I had somebody that would change my schedule. If there was a conflict that came up, I had someone who would write or help write speeches for the governmental piece of it.

So I wasn't spending time and energy doing that. And going from event to event, in the days when people actually went to events before COVID, I used the time in my car to prep myself mentally, prep myself.

You know, with speaking points, etc. So they want to actually got to the event. I wasn't spending time, you know, working through what I needed to say, etc.

That had already been prepped out. Getting charged up for events or just staying in a state where I could be go to, you know, not only the governmental, but the evening events, the weekend events.

It was really a holistic approach. know, I tried to get to the gym a couple times a week. I tried to exercise.

I tried to eat well, try to get my sleep, you know, and sometimes there were late nights and early mornings.

But I was, had flexible time where I could just take some downtime in afternoon. So I was cognizant of my energy level and also forecast what kind of energy I would need toward the end of the week and where I might get breaks where I could get It's exercise, but joy is charged me.

Once again, it was a holistic approach to trying to maintain those energy levels. wasn't just going to the event and trying to get up to another energy level in order to be of the meat people.

 

Matt Zaun 

Well, that says a lot because as far as the eating right and the exercise, because I will never forget, it must have been, it was either 2010 or 2011.

I was in a room with Like, is this the energizer bunny? you must have been up at an ungodly hour in the morning, event to event to event to event.

Now it's past midnight and you're still shaking hands. So really, it speaks to just the self care that you

You allowed, as far as energy with exercise and nutrition, just so you can maintain that energy level. So, I want to shift gears, I want to talk about potential bad experiences.

Okay, and I think it's good for anyone to hear, only politically speaking, but also business-wise, too. There's a lot of people that are going to listen to this podcast where they run teams.

So, they're running teams and not every experience is a positive experience. There have to have been times where you're at an event, someone comes up to you, they might say something nasty, they might have real pushback with you, that might really fluster.

You may be even something that tears into your character, so to speak. How do you go from that event to the next event and not skip a beat?

What do you do mentally to get through that piece?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Well, if you've been in politics for a while and been successful, you have to have somewhat of a thick skin.

I mean, not everybody likes you and not everybody expresses their like for you, but mostly when somebody comes up to you and they have an opinion, maybe it's about something you did that they don't agree with, I think the best thing to do is to listen, you know, and not necessarily push back and explain your position, but to, you know, present yourself as understanding where they're coming from.

It was surprising how often when people either called the office or I met them, you know, in person or, you know, they sent an email, my mantra was always to respond.

If someone called the office with a complaint, you know, I didn't hide behind my phone, I would, you know, my assistant would give me a number, I would call them.

just the act of listening and just the act of responding at least He's to say that I hear you, I might disagree with you.

Then you mentioned going from event to event. don't know. it gets under your skin, but for the most part, you just cannot let negative comment, negative energy drag you down.

If you're on a mission and you want to get accomplished some goals, whether it's long-term or short-term, you've got to keep focus on what your purpose is.

 

Matt Zaun 

That's a really good point. think a lot of people need to hear that because we really take different things with us that can have a major effect on the next person we're talking with.

Especially if we just got shoot out or someone said something negative and now we've to keep going and keep going.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

appreciate you mentioning that. That responding to or putting out negativity is really... I'm very rarely commenting on Facebook or telling people, you know, even third party, that I don't agree with somebody.

I try not to put out negative energy on social media so that it doesn't come back to me.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

That's something that a lot of people need to hear because that stuff stays with us. Exactly. It's in a big, big way.

I want people to think bigger about this. We're talking about your background, obviously, politically, but there's a lot people can gain networking wise in the business world and in the nonprofit world.

It really transcends different industries, for sure. Someone's out there and they're trying to grow their business, they're doing networking, or maybe they serve on a board of a nonprofit and they want to go into different events to really carry out that mission.

Where would someone start the process of getting better at networking?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Well, as they say, it's not Not practice that makes perfect, it's perfect practice that makes perfect. the more you do it, the better you get.

know, when I always thought that I got to be a better communicator, better speaker, because I was speaking every day.

But one thing I want to underscore is the fact that to get good at networking, to get good pretty much at anything like that, you have to spend some Some time also, not just going to the event meeting person, some person jotting down there, their phone number and everything, but actually spending some time during your day to reflect upon who you've met, whom you've met, reflect upon what they said.

And it's in that there's quiet times that you might see various connections that you didn't see right away. And so I spend some time every day trying to think about

Who could connect me to somebody I want to meet, who I could connect somebody to. So, you know, the networking, at least a critical part of it, takes place in your mind.

And to get better at it, you know, you reflect upon what you said, what you could say better next time, and then go to the next event.

more you do it, the better you will get.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

Yeah, that reflective time really ties into the, it's a good follow up. It amazes me in business how many people don't properly follow up.

can't tell you how many times I'm talking to someone that were, it's really a sales process. This person's trying to sell me on something.

It's an incredible presentation. I love the product or service they're selling. want to buy, you know, my wife and I are in agreement with it, with it.

And they don't follow And it's just lost. So I think the reflective time really goes back to how are you going to keep in touch with the person?

Because you know, Terence, you could have an incredible conversation with someone at an event and there could be some synergy on they want to work with whatever deal or whatever is happening.

if there's no follow up, that is not going to happen. So do you have anything to say regarding having really good solid follow up?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Well, if I can and time's always limitation. You know, whether it's that evening or the next day, I'll send them a little note.

First of all, just, you know, great to talk to you at the Chamber of Events. And I'm looking forward to receiving your information about your product.

So that sort of touchstone or ping to them will remind them. I also reach out to people for if I see an article in the paper that maybe mentions that.

I'm getting an award or a company. I'll use that as a touchstone to reach out to that person. I follow people on Facebook and I usually send a note on their birthdays.

90% of those will just say thank you. But one person or the ten of the hundred will respond, what are you doing?

I was thinking about you and maybe we should get together for coffee. So just any sort of touch point that can keep your network alive and warm is good and your follow-up can remind someone of their follow-up.

And if you were really interested in their product, it might be you that actually follows up. Not through pride that you would say, they'd say,

I should be in touch with me, but through just generosity of spirit that you would say, hey, this person's probably really busy.

Let me remind them that they were going to get something to me.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

Sure. I like you mentioning the cards. I've actually received some of those cards, so thank you. But think about it from a monetary perspective.

Like everyone talks about, oh, price of stamps keeps going up. Well, it's a really low cost when you think of the ripple effects it can have, meaning just the scenario you said about 100 cards being sent out.

That is not that big of a cost to stay in touch with people. And so few people are getting that type of personal card in their mailbox that it really stands out.

So I remember when you did that quite often, and I thought it was really impressive that you were able to connect with people in that way.

So for everyone screaming, oh, it's so hard to get above the noise when it comes to social media. Media and all these different marketing and advertising avenues are a really good place to look.

That I think is very much underutilized is people's mailboxes.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

So thanks for mentioning that. No, you're exactly right. Thank you for mentioning it because in this day and age, people are eager to send an email, text message.

But when you get a handwritten note in the mail, or even a typed letter in the mail, but a handwritten note is the gold standard, you remember that person and you're thankful for them.

And there's so little competition nowadays for forgetting a real personal kind of note in the mail. I just recently sent a check to a friend of mine who's running for reelection in another county.

But I also included a handwritten note to say how much this person meant to me and why I was contributing.

So hopefully that will stick around for a while and elevate our friendship above the noise. if you want to do something and I'm a politician and you probably know him also, who made the habit of after they saw someone during the day, spent the time in the evening writing a little note to them that they would collect and send out right before an election.

So they would recall that they met at the post office and had a conversation about the Philadelphia Phillies. And then they would send it out, you know, as if maybe six months later, but recalling that conversation in the, was handwritten.

And it was very effective. person won when other similar politicians lost. I will not undervalue the force of a handwritten note.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

Power of the pen.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

The power of pen.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

Matt Zaun, Terence Farrell, mattzaun Keywords, Matt Farrell,.com. Matt Zaun, mattzaun Matt Matt Zaun, Keywords, Keywords, Keywords, Matt Zaun, Keywords, Zaun, mattzaun Matt Zaun, Farrell, mattzaun Matt

And then I also appreciate you mentioning the energy piece, the energy coming into the meeting, but also the energy after, which is that reflection time.

here's where I met, here's where the energy was, here's where I need to follow out. So I think those three components were so incredibly important in this conversation.

So thank you for that. Now if people want to get more information on what you do or they want to reach out to you, where's the best place they can go to get that information?

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Well, they can go to my LinkedIn profile and hopefully you'll drop a link to that profile in the comments for your podcast.

That's probably the best way. They can get an email address from there.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

We can start a conversation if that's what they want to do. Perfect. I'll include that in the show notes.

People can just click and go to your LinkedIn profile from there. So thanks again, Terence.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

very much appreciate this conversation. Well, thank you, Matt. It's always great to be on your podcast and I get insights

When you sum up what I've said, so I appreciate your summing up what I've said.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

For sure.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Yeah. Enjoy your downtime as you prepare for your next networking event.

 

Matt Zaun (mattzaun.com)

Thanks. Sounds good, Terence.

 

Terence Farrell (Terence Farrell)

Thank you.